no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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