I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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