her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
