He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
