the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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