Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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