dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
