The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
