Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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