im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
