I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
