The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
