You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
