I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Randomize
