Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
