I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
