When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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