hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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