And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
