We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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