dude i'm inner monologue high
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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