Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
