If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Come see our sink grown plant.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
