I'm lost and stupid without you.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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