office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
