How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
