Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
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