I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
