dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
