i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
we made out on top of his cat.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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