I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
