I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
they need to just BURY HIM!
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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