he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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