I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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