I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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