I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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