You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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