yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
