just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
