He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
