in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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