I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
