we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize