Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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