I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
