She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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