Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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