ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
we made out on top of his cat.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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