So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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