i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize
